Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
