Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
