her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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