went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
