with your own penis?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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