Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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