Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
