okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
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