it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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