if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
