butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
