So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
