she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
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