I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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