she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
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I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
You left your underwear on the fireplace
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...