Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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