how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My liver just had a heart attack.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
