there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
