so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
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