I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I want to be your penis for a week.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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