I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
