I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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