As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Just pee around me
don't judge my taste in strippers
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
