he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
