I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Randomize
