friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
