i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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