is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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