Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Is it penis luge time yet?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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