she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Randomize
