i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
How does it feel to date your dad?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
