Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
