woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
