I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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