3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
