let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
