Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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