just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
