Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize
