Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
