After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
