Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize