She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
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Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
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Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
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