The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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