If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
