Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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