Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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