We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
