I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
