I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize