this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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